I am going down a path I have traveled many times. The Fading leaves colorize the hills and Valleys like a neatly woven blanket. The narrow, winding path shows no sign of direction, destiny not in site, hidden among the hills at a short distance. I hold on to the wheels, dare not blink or look around, not to go off the hill. The danger disappears in the hypnotic beauty surrounding me, with the vibrant, colorful foliage confining me in a breath I couldn’t inhale. A Moment of awakening!
The young, healthy greenery that carpeted these hills once, now at the end of its time, still vibrant, falling off its holds, gracefully weaving a colorful blanket covering the hills and mountains far and near before giving its last in nourishing the grounds. I’ve seen it from beginning to end, the cycle of life, how nature accepts it with pride, playing its part, and giving it all to the end!
Another life lesson realized: wisdom falls on me like I am at the end of time. My breath is shallow, and my eyes tear with a peaceful wave. My thoughts are questioning: can it be now, today, or years from now, but it doesn’t matter? I feel ready now to accept the unknown and embrace what’s beyond. No need for struggle, begging for more time, or fear to say goodbye to this borrowed life? Parents, children, life partners, and even the pets we loved dearly were borrowed to fulfill this life. Nothing belongs to us; everything we received in this lifetime we must return at the end.
Accepting this realization is not easy. We each face those moments differently, depending on how we have lived. Returning moments can come in many ways, like fear, troubles, struggles, regrets, and physical and emotional pain. When I think of my parents, I remember the tears and the happy smiles on their fallen faces; I did not see hope there, but love, only love. In their lifetime, they suffered and struggled, but they faced all those life sorrows with a smile on their face and strength in their heart. I have never heard them complain about anything or anyone, never showed disappointment, or blamed anyone but lived their life to the fullest. In the end, did they realize that their lives were borrowed, the time was borrowed, that we, the children, were borrowed and had to let go? Is that why the last hugs from my mother felt a bit longer than usual? Is that why they didn’t struggle, scream, or cry at their last breath? They just went to bed and peacefully, gracefully said goodbye to this borrowed life as they left their bodies. I see that as a blessing! How can we all breathe our last that peacefully, to let go of our time, life, family, friends, connections we made, and lastly, our body to go beyond to the unknown?
With this realization, my soul is awakened, and I find peace. I feel ready to give back all that I have borrowed without regrets. I feel no need to struggle or beg for more time; I will have no last words or requests to fulfill. When that time finds me, just like my parents, hopefully, I can leave in peace!
It’s been a while since I wrote anything. I hope you find a lesson here. Please leave a comment!
Bea