The young, healthy greenery that carpeted these hills once, now at the end of its time, still vibrant, falling off its holds, gracefully weaving a colorful blanket covering the hills and mountains far and near before giving its last in nourishing the grounds. I’ve seen it from beginning to end, the cycle of life, how nature accepts it with pride, playing its part, and giving it all to the end!

Another life lesson realized: wisdom falls on me like I am at the end of time. My breath is shallow, and my eyes tear with a peaceful wave. My thoughts are questioning: can it be now, today, or years from now, but it doesn’t matter? I feel ready now to accept the unknown and embrace what’s beyond. No need for struggle, begging for more time, or fear to say goodbye to this borrowed life? Parents, children, life partners, and even the pets we loved dearly were borrowed to fulfill this life. Nothing belongs to us; everything we received in this lifetime we must return at the end.

Accepting this realization is not easy. We each face those moments differently, depending on how we have lived. Returning moments can come in many ways, like fear, troubles, struggles, regrets, and physical and emotional pain. When I think of my parents, I remember the tears and the happy smiles on their fallen faces; I did not see hope there, but love, only love. In their lifetime, they suffered and struggled, but they faced all those life sorrows with a smile on their face and strength in their heart. I have never heard them complain about anything or anyone, never showed disappointment, or blamed anyone but lived their life to the fullest. In the end, did they realize that their lives were borrowed, the time was borrowed, that we, the children, were borrowed and had to let go? Is that why the last hugs from my mother felt a bit longer than usual? Is that why they didn’t struggle, scream, or cry at their last breath? They just went to bed and peacefully, gracefully said goodbye to this borrowed life as they left their bodies. I see that as a blessing! How can we all breathe our last that peacefully, to let go of our time, life, family, friends, connections we made, and lastly, our body to go beyond to the unknown?
With this realization, my soul is awakened, and I find peace. I feel ready to give back all that I have borrowed without regrets. I feel no need to struggle or beg for more time; I will have no last words or requests to fulfill. When that time finds me, just like my parents, hopefully, I can leave in peace!

It’s been a while since I wrote anything. I hope you find a lesson here. Please leave a comment!

Bea

Bea

Food, wine, no! I need not 
Music, dancing seems too extreme
Family and friends, let them be
Just get me home to my dear kids
  
Smile, I will smile until my last breath
Unfulfilled dreams, no they make no sense
So little time, but so much at stake
To let the living free before end 
  
No, I will have no last will
To see or be with any, but my kids
Maybe a thank you, to my old mom
But no goodbyes even to my man
  
No, I will not confess my sins
Or waste time on apologies and regrets
Even tears, I shall shed the least
Seek no pity, no solace from any 
  
My children, my last wish
To caress, and feel next to my skin
To tell how they do me proud
And let go 'ere I breathe my last 

Bea

 Read, Enjoy and leave a comment.

A little boy found a wounded parrot, on the side of the road. He brought it home, put it in a cage, and took care of it. Parrot survived, but It lost one eye and was able to see only from one side. Marly, the parrot was very bright that It learned to speak, and each morning It cried out to all the family members by their names until they responded. Marly also knew how to unhook the latch and come out of the cage. It went around the cage while hanging on to the cables. Since the bird could see only from one eye, all Marly could see was the cables around and was unaware if It was outside or inside the cage, so Marly didn’t fly away. One day, while hanging outside the cage, the bird had lost its grip and had flown away. The family tried to find Marly. They heard It calling out their names far away in the woods but was unable to get to Marly. A few days later, the calling stopped, and they were unaware whether Marly survived in the wild or if It died. The little boy in this story was my husband, and when he told me this story, I felt connected to this bird, and it felt as if it was my story, the story of my experience.
When I escaped my physical prison, just like that wounded bird, all I saw was the barriers around me. I didn’t feel free because I had other prisons to break out from mental, spiritual, and political. Blindly, I held onto the wires outside my cage, until I flew out, into the unknown, to this country with my broken wings, looking for freedom, to build a new home. For many long years, I stayed lost to the world. I believed it was my fault, and I was to blame for what had happened to me, so I hid in shame. Here in this land, among strangers, I learned to live again. I experienced the meaning of freedom. The compassion and the love I received in this land, gave me the strength to come out of my hiding. You accepted me, without throwing stones, tended to my wounds. You reached out to me, taught me to live through my pain, and to be proud of myself. You showed me it was okay to make mistakes and to live my life without fear. You told me it was my right, and that it didn’t matter where I come from, what language I spoke, or what they did to me. So here I am, flapping my new wings, trying to make things right by giving back what I learned from you to help you understand and make you aware of why we have to continue to support our brothers and sisters from this evil trade of slavery. Give them what you gave me, help them to escape from their prisons, be their voice, take their hands, and guide them to stand on their feet again. Be the inspiration!

I invite you to join me in my journey of healing through love and forgiveness. My goal is to inspire you to reach for the starts, believe in your dreams, and believe in yourself!

No matter what your concerns are, feeling lost, sad, afraid, or in pain, physically or emotionally, let’s come together and find the courage to face our fears through our spirit!